4/11/2006

"Coke Is It" (Tragedy, LP Unreleased...and you can imagine which coke he was talking about. Great song, anti-drug...roughly.)

SODA REVIEW: A new coffee-flavored/cola fusion thang called (officially?) Coca-Cola Blaq.

They were giving this out in sample form in Midtown yesterday, around the N-R stop, a favorite color of funerals and poker players trying too hard to be intimidating (Black) combined with a company that sells tons of sugar water around the world and has absolutely and utterly corrupted the Mexican diet. (Coca-Cola.)

(Before: Corn tortillas, beans, water. This actually does keep the poor healthy, as those who know health [Kelvin? And your folks? Comment back, young'un.] can say, complete amino acids and such.)

(After: Tortillas, beans, Coke. It does change things a lot and gives the poor something else they shouldn't be spending their few pesos on. I'm serious about all this, but yeah, I know, I'm not a Mexican, and further more, I don't exactly blame Coke for this. I haven't read No Logo yet, although I know I should.)

That was a long tangent. Here's what Coke's new, upcoming product is, in a few words: the ol' cola, sugared and all like it was meant to be, plus coffee.

Does this sound bad?

You're wrong. Those who know and have drank and have loved Manhattan Special (which is made in...and yes, by-laws say I must shout it...BROOKLYN!), an espresso-extracted soda that will make coffee lovers reconsider ever purchasing one of Starbucks' 500 calorie monstrocities might understand. Coke is onto something for those who can't get Manhattan Special. Some tweaking will be in order eventually, but this isn't like the recent disappointing Sprite Remixes at all. This needs to catch on.

Grade: B+

By the way, since when was Sugar Hill an opera label? The original one ("Rapper's Delight," "The Message," "That's The Joint," and other hits you can listen to for days) went under long ago, but do they understand how ridiculous this is?

(Or that I'm going to send a team of talented graf artists on them with a full supply of markers and one of those spray paint machines that are advertised for house-painting?)

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