"I'm Still #1" (Boogie Down Productions, By Any Means Necessary)

#2: Bryant Park
Set-up nicely for a lunch break to those mass unfortunates working in Midtown (I've been one of you...and might be one of you again soon, oh poor souls), but better still for "freelancers" (or the "unemployable") like me, free Internet, located near the place where WetLAB's rough draft show is going up in a few hours, and it's very, very nice now that the rain stopped falling.

Grade: A

#17: Kim's (at Astor Place)
A copy of Diamonds and Pearls on vinyl yesterday: $2. A copy of a Sensational album: $1.

Actual cash value of said pieces of miscellaneous inessential music: $5. ($6 for the Diamonds and Pearls, -$1 for the Sensational, not because I don't sometimes like his bizarre combination of not quite beats and not quite rhymes, but because it seems as though his shit is sold exclusively in dollar bins these days.)

Grade: B+
Damage to Wallet: Incomplete

#34: Read Cafe, Williamsburg, Brooklyn (Bedford, N. 8th)
$2 beer at 5 p.m. is good; especially since it's Harpoon in three delicious varieties served in nice long mugs off the tap. Effects of attempting to drink and read or write: devastating. I can't drink in the afternoons anymore it seems. Ah, bright college days.

Grade: B

#78: Bright College Days
Shoulda played less Smash Bros. (Junior year, Cameron Leader-Picone's Nintendo 64), Super Smash Bros. (Senior year, Brandon Reynolds' GameCube), GoldenEye (Freshman year, ?'s N64), and roles in bad plays (Brother, a lame production of Six Characters In Search Of An Author, Tim, Everybody Has Lots and Lots of Sex [an unfortunate student-written production with a deviously deceptive title: no one has much sex in it, kinda like Yale]). Good times, but they get further and further away.

Grade: A-

#99: Ex-girlfriend before last ex-girlfriend before last before last
Had a nice pair of...legs.

Grade: B- (mediocre personality)

#4,080: Industry Rule #4,080
Record company people are shady.

Grade: CREDIT (on Cr/D/Fail scale. Rule is still true.)